I have a collection of framed quotes I call my Sassitudes and Savvytudes. I collected them for quite some time and then realized I should share them. You can sign up if you’re interested:
Sassitudes & Savvytudes
Today I was sorting my collection and came across the Sassitude posted above. I had another chuckle and then realized that while it’s cute, it’s also really true.
So much of our life is spent fulfilling the roles our society suggests are the norm that often we forget to set ourselves a destination… a specific destination.
Then there’s that phrase “be somebody”. “Somebody” usually refers to a person who has had the type of success that makes them well-known, well-paid, well-respected and a well-spring of knowledge about their area of expertise. All that “well” is a goal worth aiming for! However… aiming for anything means you need a target. To be accurate, that target needs to precisely defined.
The “precise” bit is where so many of us slip up… or fall down.
Teachers or Nurses, Oh My
When I was young, most girls thought they’d be teachers or nurses. When I got into high school, the thought of becoming an archaeologist was intriguing. Then I was going to be a social worker. Looking at those career choices now, I know I didn’t get any more specific than those terms. I didn’t think that I’d love to teach Math to middle school children, or that I’d be an ER nurse, or base my archaeological endeavours around The Cairns in The Orkneys, or become an advocate for Inner City children. Specificity was not a concept that touched any part of my planning department.
Was I Living in DreamLand?
I’m almost afraid to ask this question – was I living in DreamLand all those years or was I the norm?
Nowadays I certainly have pretty specific goals, in several areas of my life. It makes planning much easier because I can ask the questions “does this get me closer to my goal?” Makes me wonder what I might have accomplished if I had learned specificity decades ago!! Interestingly, when I talk to my 8-yr old grandson about his possible future plans, I do ask questions that make him clarify his thoughts (realizing, of course, that it could all change tomorrow!) It’s quite fun!
How About You?
How about you? If you want to be “somebody”, is she clearly defined? If your ‘somebody’ is domestic, like a fab Gramma, have you decided what your version of a fab Gramma looks like? If you want to be the best blogger in your niche, have you set parameters for what that means? If you want to set up an Amazon store, what will you sell to whom for how much?
Hopefully the rest of my Sassitudes won’t provoke as much soul-searching as this one… but at least I’ll have blog fodder for the next year!!
Let me know if you’ve been quite specific about who you want to be and how you want to show up… or, like me, have you kind of floated with the current too?
The ever present challenge for me is to be specific for the long term – just another way of saying that I like to flow with the current also. However as the years go by and a more definite space of time opens up it seems to spur that need to be specific. On the other hand, being too specific limits vision,I think.
Great point, Judith! Being specific while maintaining openness around the potential, or the possibilities! Hopefully not too fine a line for everyone here!
I love the look of your blog Agnes, and I’m going to enjoy reading more. I also believe how we think about things is a) so entrenched and b) needs to be worked on constantly. I’m currently with family and I always feel as if I do or say the wrong thing, or don’t quite stack up in their eyes. I need to reframe my thinking. Also agree about our younger days, although I think I’d add another option to nurses and teachers as career choices for women – mine was secretary – I was told to become one –… Read more »
Thanks, Johanna, and Welcome! One of the things I appreciate about this age (and with parents both gone) is no longer seeing family that cause stress. Good luck to you and remember that any apparent shortcomings others see in you is about them, not you. I did try to become a secretary (steno) back in the day for that “fall back on” reason but was too impatient to perfect my typing or really get a handle on shorthand (maybe because my mother was an ace at both)! I’m enjoying everyone in the #MLSTL family – looking forward to reading more… Read more »
From the time I was eight I wanted to travel – more specifically, I wanted to travel to Paris. I managed to go my junior year of high school on an exchange program and that cemented the dream even more. I went to college where I planned to major in French and Spanish and become an international flight attendant. But then… life went a different direction. I figured those dreams were left behind. Fast forward several decades (!) and I found myself teaching English in a small private school. I wanted to improve my confidence in British literature, so I… Read more »
I love how the Universe presents your dreams in different ways, Molly! and more importantly, you understood the calls. Your adventures sound like a lot of fun, Congratulations!
As I approach retirement from the corporate world, I am just working out the “someone” I want to be in this next phase of life. Thank you for the reminder to be specific about what that looks like. As a child I wanted to be a spokesmodel and then later a dental assistant. I’m not sure what intrigued me about either of those very different career aspirations. 🙂 #MLSTL
I’m happy you have the opportunity to decide what your next phase will be – and that you’re taking it. I’m sure there’s a whole branch of psychology somewhere that looks at our childhood aspirations and decides what it all means. or maybe there’s a career choice for you! 🙂
This is interesting because I still find myself not being specific with goals. The quote did make me laugh because I feel the same way.
Victoria, I’ve chuckled at that quote numerous times… this time it made me stop and think – not sure why. Glad I could give you a chuckle! (or that Lily did!)
When I was at school I wanted to be an Egyptologist – beats me why – all that desert sun and sand and spiderwebs (what was I thinking!) Not to mention cursed tombs!
Now I’m happy just trying to figure out what the best version of being “me” is – living authentically, not worrying about what other people think, finding joy in the every day things, laughing, caring, oh the list is so long! But fun to be growing into a better person.
#MLSTL 🙂
Haha… the innocence of youth! perhaps you were so specific you didn’t see the bigger picture! Leanne, I love how so many of us finally realize that the very best we can be is the very best version of ourselves. I’m hoping we can make it contagious!
I certainly have drifted through my life, going where the currents have taken me. While I never did end up a “somebody”, I have had a most interesting life; done lots, seen lots, been lots. Now I AM somebody – ME! Happily contented and holding memories of some of the escapades conveniently close. When I need a chuckle, I remember.
I so identify with that, Robin! To look back on our adventures with fondness is a good thing. To be happy being “Me” in the present is even better.
I’m a long-time fan of Lili Tomlin. Her above quote is so true! I ended up in a career that I loved… a small part by being specific (I’m a detail nerd) and a large part by luck. Your post makes sense. The more specific that I find that I am, the closer to the target I usually land!
Great that your attention to detail gave you a career you love! I’m a detail nerd too but never made the leap – in the early days – to using the skill to find me my fabulous career! Better late than never, perhaps! Thanks for stopping by, Donna!
It has taken me until just recently to work out who I am, Agnes and to actually like ‘me’. The somebody I want to be is to help inspire and motivate other women to embrace life with an ageless attitude. Like you inspiring others and myself keeps me positive and active in life. I’ve subscribed to your Sassitudes and Savvytudes (love those names). Thanks so much for linking up and being part of our #MLSTL community. Have a beautiful day. xx
And you do do that, Sue!! So many women “our age” are claiming their true selves and embracing the support and community we have. As I rapidly approach 64 I love finally being ageless! As I say that I’m thinking we need a movement to dispense with birthdays after 60, we should claim a day that means something to us, and celebrate it as our Lifeday! Thanks for signing up – hope you enjoy the Sassitudes and Savvytudes!